[awwlie]

I am not sure how I could explain what I saw that day,
wandering down the steps,

I felt as if I saw myself, lying down on the floor.

I kept staring: Again and again, yelling out for them to identify themselves.

They didn't respond: Yet, deep inside I felt as if I was being looked.
I was staring at myself: What was left of my inner will, - my whim.

How could I not explain it?
It clearly was a part of myself dying, abandoning the sinking ship.

Why was this part of myself afraid to face the upcoming fate of death?

Was I afraid of death?
How it stained my stained soul..

How it made my promises nil?

I couldn't tell you, - if only you could respond to my inquiries..

Yet, there you lay lifeless without a worry in the world.

Is this my fate too? 

I have no allies left to ask for help..

They'd shun me if they knew the truth..

Maybe that is the fate I deserve for all my plots.

I've had to fight for the smallest motes of respect: 

Each budding day, almost feels like a new battle.

If only..

The world didn't seek to end my faith,
I could still clasp to hope, the world isn't as ill as I perceived it to be.

Is there even a cure..

to ail ignorance..

No..

Why should I care how the world feels?
It's been nothing but silent to me.

Maybe... it should die, like we foretold..

it doesn't matter how it shapes up to be,

it will be bent back to its old shape once more soon after,

that is the curse Kraus placed upon us.

'The Perfect World'

how silly

At least..

This world made me aware,

that I could help it be better if not for a while,

then for eternia.. if these hands of mine finish that last part..

already chocking in darkness.

Ayse was but an front...

wasn't it?

I was never just Ayse,

I was so much more..

I was so blind to it at first.

I am not Yaeka, either..

No matter how alike we are,

how different we are..

neither am I Rubie,

even as long as it has been since she died...

In the end..

I am just a Priestess of Art and Beauty.

and...

I am happy with that..

even if the world must bleed for my muse.

if happiness is what I still feel..

when everyone bleeds..

and their hearts cease to beat..

Maybe..

I am a Martyr.